I Could Get Used To This Vacation Stuff

Rest is good. I guess God does know something that I don't. Who would have thought? Judy and I and the kids just got back from 4 days in Carlsbad and I can't believe how the Lord could provide us such rest at a time we needed it most.

It's so nice that we can go from 110 degrees to a sunset like the one above in only two hours. We truly are blessed to live where we do. There is just something about a sunset over the ocean that brings me to a place of worship. He put all this in place, the waves, the sun, the sand and yet He still desires to spend time with me. How cool is that?

Judy and I keep busy all year long so it was nice to have a minimal agenda. We actually stayed in bed in the morning past eight o'clock. I know now why we don't have black-out curtains at home. Our kids would be late to school everyday and the Lord wouldn't know who I am since I would oversleep my quiet time.

This vacation came at just the right time for our family. Judy and I feel called by the Lord to be on the front-lines of marriage so he has been fine-tuning us the whole month of August. We went three straight weeks having pretty heated discussions in our marriage that left Judy asking, "Does everyone else have to have their closets cleaned out like us? God has us deal with everything!"

Judy and I have been committed to seeing growth through the struggles. Since I believe we are both tracking with the Lord, He is constantly changing and transforming us. And through these changes in ourselves we have had to learn to adapt to the changes in the other. It's been a bumpy road, but God brings tremendous peace on the other side.

The scripture that God keeps bringing to me comes from 1 Corinthians 13:5 where it says love does not demand its own way. Obviously, it says a lot more about love in this chapter, but for now, not being demanding speaks a lot to me right now. I have no place or no right to demand my wife change or do something for me that I want because it would make my life easier.

I have surrendered all claims to my life to the Lord and I know He will use Judy to meet my needs as He will use others, but I can't mold and shape her into what I want her to do. So she knows I will take my concerns to the Lord if I think she should change in any area. I know the Holy Spirit is working in her so I'll let Him do the work and trust Him for the results.

We come back now refreshed and ready for ministry. We love marriage and all that it can bring to a family as well as to society. If we're to help and bring encouragement to others, we know we have to deal with things in our backyard. As well as our closets.

Striving For The Sexy Marriage

A magazine cover caught my eye recently at the check-out stand at the market. It was a women's magazine and on the cover was actress Kyra Sedgwick and it had a sub-heading about her and her hubby Kevin Bacon keep their marriage sexy after 20 years.

As I often do in the check-out lines when it comes to the magazines, I had to laugh. A sexy marriage. Now Judy and I have been married over 20 years and I was thinking, "Do we have a sexy marriage like Kevin and Kyra?" "What is a sexy marriage?" In this day and age have you noticed everything is sexy from hair to pillows to cars to shoes?

I didn't buy the magazine at that point even though I was curious to hear Kyra's story as to how someone in Hollywood could be married more than two years yet alone 20. I ended up finding the article online and even though I don't know them to be Christians, just being married 20 years and not quitting did give her some insight.

Some things she said were a bit weird like "I'm constantly amazed that we are still surprised and interested in each other." Let me touch that one. While I can be amazed at how God still surprises me with new things about Judy, the last thing I would say is I'm surprised I'm still interested in her. Let's face it, if we didn't change and hopefully for the better, wouldn't it be a bit boring knowing this is what I can expect till death do us part?

As believers, we should forever be changing into His image and thus life should never be boring. I don't want to be the same man and husband for Judy this time next year and I don't expect her to be the same wife as well. We have been riding an August roller-coaster in our marriage that I am committed to turning into growth. If we don't grow from disputes then all that is left is hurt feelings and resentment.

One of the wise things she said about keeping the relationship strong was, "We got help when we needed to be alone. We check in with each other all the time. I think that's ultimately the best for the kids, because they feel safe when they know Mum and Dad are good, enjoying each other's company and wanting to be alone together."

It's so easy to get caught up in the routine of being parents. Homework, lunches, bus-driving, the works. It all starts up again in 10 days. Let me say "Woo Hoo." Now in June it will be a different story. But Judy and I have been big advocates for going on dates and spending time alone. We know we will be of no use to Taylor and Shelby if we're not good, if we're at odds or being of one voice.

Our "date nights" have changed over the years from going out to dinner for a nice meal to a trip down to Starbucks or lately sitting out back or front with no interruptions enjoying a glass of wine and good conversation. Like Kyra said in the quote above, the kids feel "safer" when the parents are "good." Isn't that a place we all want to be?

I encourage you all to find your "date night" with your spouse. Find what can work for you and try not to talk about the kids while you are on your date. I love when our conversation can be about meaningful things or Godly things. I call it talking in the "Spirit." We have taken on the task of doing a book study together about Jesus. We read a chapter at a time and then discuss it. It's help bring a freshness and newness factor to our conversations.

Have a great weekend everyone. Enjoy the final days of your summer. God is good and He is sending us to Carlsbad for four days starting on Sunday. I will catch up with you all next Friday and if you are interested and have made it this far I have tried to make posting a comment easier by taking out some of the restrictions. You don't have to set up a google account. Sorry it took so long to make the change. I'm still learning this whole blog thing. See you next week.

A Great Illustration

This doesn't happen often. I blog about agape love on Monday and then on Tuesday I saw a movie that perfectly illustrates it. Maybe you have noticed on my blog the movie recommendation list and it's quite short. It only has one movie and it wasn't mainstream at all.

It's not that Judy and I don't like to go to the movies, but have you noticed this summer every movie seems to be some sort of superhero story. Even movies that don't start with a comic book superhero background still seem to create superpowered characters out of regular people.

The movie I'm playing reviewer to here is "Henry Poole is Here." I first heard about this movie on Rush Limbaugh's website and he's the first to admit he is pretty much an action oriented movie kind of guy. From there I went to www.pluggedinonline.com to read there review and I immediately knew this was the kind of movie for Judy and I to see.

The movie is actually playing at the mall theatres and when Judy and I arrived five minutes before the movie we were the only ones there. I asked Judy if she appreciated that I booked the theatre for her for our date night. She set me straight not to try anything with her.

Without detailing the story line I will tell you that it is a great God story. The central character in the movie, Henry Poole, buys a home and just wants to be left alone. God had a different plan as each person He sends to Henry offers kindness and love and looks for nothing in return from him.

The movie is subtle and not preachy about God though God is mentioned a lot in the movie. It's all about people loving an unlovable person and it doesn't necessarily wrap up in an hour and a half to a beautiful happy ending. It doesn't mean the ending isn't good, but it leaves things to the imagination.

It's a great feeler movie with elements that will make some cry, but it also forces you to think. It became great dialogue for Judy and I this morning as we discussed our favorite scenes and how we saw God work in the various characters. It's the type of movie that doesn't come out Hollywood often so I'm curious to the background of the script and the fact that Hollywood has to know that conservatives will like the movie.

The other plus for Judy and I was the movie was clean with just a few curse words that didn't seem out of place for the character. They didn't spoil the movie by adding sex to a scene that 99% of today's movies would have.

There's my movie plug for the day. A movie with a good story with characters that can't fly or beat up 10 guys at a time. Just a man struggling with life, faith and purpose and what can happen when God puts loving people in his path. I pray that we can all pour into people each day with the kind of love that God has shown us.

Loving The Unlovable

You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that.

Matthew 5:43:47 NLT

Have you ever read through God's word and especially the teachings of Jesus and find yourself glancing over or moving on when you read something that doesn't make sense or is really hard to do. This verse from the words of Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount is one of those verses for me.

Can you fathom what Jesus is asking us to do in this verse? I'm not only supposed to love the likable and kind and great people in my life, but also the difficult ones as well. I know I am not alone here. We all have difficult people in our lives and Jesus rightly points out (doesn't He always?) we're not doing any favors for the Kingdom if we ignore those that say rude things to us or give us cutting or sarcastic remarks or are just downright mean.

The type of love that Jesus is talking about here is from the Greek word, agape. You've probably heard this word in your days in church and the key component to the meaning is selflessness, not doing something for someone because we are looking for something in return. Imagine that. This was the type of love Jesus poured out for us on the cross. He loved us so much that He was willing to die so we might have eternal life.

This verse from Matthew came to me after reading in 1 John 4:7 where it says, "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. How do I know if I love God? This verse says if I am loving others and Jesus says that includes those we don't know or don't like.

Identify the difficult people in your lives. Maybe it's your boss, your neighbor, your co-worker or maybe it's someone closer like a relative. Now I won't say that all difficult people are non-believers, but even if they know Christ, they musn't know His love very well. Think of ways to just love on them. Meet a need, say hello, send them a text, but try something.

If we're doing the tough things that God call us to do, like love everyone imajine the impact we can have. Our minds can get so cluttered with God stuff at times lately I have been going out the door in the morning telling myself to just love people and love them expecting nothing in return.

Because it won't be nothing you get since God will have noticed and He will receive the glory. Isn't that why we are all here?

Let Me Stop What I'm Doing And Listen

I love the Lord because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy. Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!

Psalm 116:1-2 NLT

I'm weird. I admit it. Things pop in my head at times and I wonder how those thoughts got there. One is this image that God is in human body form with arms and legs and He walks around heaven ruling His kingdom all the while keeping an eye on things down here.

Part of my thinking I'm sure comes from the scripture that says that we are made in His image and that God did come in human form through Jesus' time on Earth, but nonetheless, I find myself drifting away and putting God in a box. I don't know why I need to remind myself that God is with me all the while He is with my wife and at the same time He is with my kids.

That being said, in regards to the above Psalm, a little mental picture is okay. Just the thought that each day when I lift my prayers to the Lord they do not get crowded out because someone else is also bringing requests to Him. God is not up in heaven saying, "Enough!! Can't I have a little quiet? I can't hear Mark because all his friends are talking to me at the same time. One at a time please."

Instead, He hears all of us and my favorite image is that of God bending down to listen. It's not us shouting up to Him and waking Him up, but the Lord is actively waiting to hear from us and like I used to do when Taylor and Shelby were younger, I would bend down to their level to hear them. I know they liked it when I bent down because now we were looking eye to eye and it wasn't so intimidating for them.

Since we know He bends down to hear us and He listens, isn't it more comforting to keep active in prayer? While we can't forget the omnipresence of God I think it's healthy enough to imagine God bending down and setting all heavenly matters aside and hearing what is on our hearts and minds. Let us not forget that we always have an audience on one.

Guilty!!

I want to expand on a subject that came up in church last week and God showed me again in a book I'm currently reading so I guess it's important enough to go a little deeper. It's a subject that we may not like to talk about a lot and especially about ourselves. It's the subject of sin.

Now I will be the first to admit that I can be quick to notice the sin in other people's lives and a little slow to notice mine. When I come to my confession time during prayer, I admit that I ask the Lord did I sin yesterday? How ridiculous, huh? As if I went through the day not missing the mark, but the point is we easily give ourselves grace.

Where Pastor Bob was great to point out this past weekend is we have two types of sin: sins of commission and sins of omission. The first ones are a little more obvious I think. These are the things that we do wrong, the breaking of His law, the world's law and the like. The sins of omission are not quite that obvious. These are sins where we fail to act or we're lazy or disobedient. In short, we don't do the things we ought to do.

"Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it." James 4:17. Just a reminder that it's God telling us about our omission and not man. If we're walking and tracking with the Lord, sins of omission are the ones I think most believers will be committing. We're wise enough to know what we shouldn't do, but often it's a little easier to hide the things we should be doing. I will use myself as an example.

I am blessed to be married to a wise Godly woman who sees things that I don't often see. She sees the big picture very well when I can get caught up in the excitement of a moment or an event. Recently and not intentionally I will point out, I sinned. I missed the mark on how I should have been treating her and she called me on the carpet for it.

Normally, my first reaction is to get defensive, but the Holy Spirit had me stay silent and listen to why she was upset with me. I eventually tried to muster a defense, but ultimately I was convicted. I was guilty. I had not acted in a very loving way to my wife. "For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church." Ephesians 5:25

If Christ had loved the church this way we would be in big trouble. Thankfully, I have a loving wife who has the freedom to point out my sin and where it can be hard to take at the time, the benefit is tremendous. From there, we were able to come together in prayer and I could take it to the Lord and know in my heart I was forgiven. It was a true 1John 1:9 moment. I was completely cleansed from all unrighteousness.

A verse I take very seriously as a husband is from 1Peter 3:7. The last part of the long verse says that I am to treat her as I should so my prayers will not be hindered. This means if I am not treating Judy the way I should according to His word, the prayers that I offer on your behalf will fall on deaf ears. I don't want that to happen since I pray for you all regularly.

I try to find the spiritual in all things and since Judy and I have reconciled and restored, the peace over us has been overwhelming. There is a new sense of freedom and a deeper sense of love. I believe we experience this peace with our Heavenly father when we come to Him and admit we blew it when we fail to act according to His standards and that we'll strive to make it right or make it right the next time if given the opportunity again.

Isn't grace awesome? It's beautiful to see in our earthly relationships, but I'm so glad that we are saved by grace with the Lord. Have a great weekend. I love you all and today I know my prayers are going unhindered for you all.

Amen!

Take The Tried And True Way

This is what the Lord says: “Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls. But you reply, ‘No, that’s not the road we want!’

Jeremiah 6:16 NLT

Have you noticed the number of new "religions" that have sprung up recently? Usually, it has someone famous tooting its horn such as Tom Cruise with Scientology or Madonna with Kabala or Oprah singing the praises of "the Secret."

Because God gives us free will and choice and He doesn't force His way upon anyone, people are seemingly searching for purpose and direction and the proverbial "answer to the meaning of life" just about everywhere. On the home page of Kabala it says that it gives the answers to the "why" of life and it's about tapping into the energy of the universe.

You're probably like me and chuckle when you hear things like this because we know we don't need the energy of the universe when we've been empowered by the Creator of the Universe. I was on call yesterday morning and driving down Portola and I was astonished at the amount of cars in the parking lot of the Spiritual Center. It's located near the Post Office and they teach the "Secret" or so the sign says. And not only that, but they have two services on Sunday. I couldn't believe it.

At that point I stopped and prayed for those people inside because I know they are lost and are deceived each and every Sunday. Unlike our verse above, chances are these folks don't know about the old, godly ways. I don't know if they look around and see the Christian church up the street and they form an opinion about what goes on inside and they just choose the new "flavor of the month" to get to God.

My prayer for us all is that we would keep our eyes open for those "lost souls." People out there are hurting. I saw it yesterday in church as person after person left the prayer partners at the end of service with tears in their eyes and genuinely sobbing. If they're in our church chances are there is plenty who are not and trying to deal with the struggles in their own strength.

We need to invite them to experience the tried and true ways of our Heavenly Father. We know they will find a God who cares and who loves them and He will give them rest. May we be an example for Christ that represents His love instead of one that would send someone seeking the wrong road.

Can You Hear Me Now? That's Not All

We've all seen the commercials by now. I think they have gone on for years now. The nerdy Verizon guy who goes around the country and makes sure everyone has a cell phone signal saying, "Do you hear me now? Good." It was funny at first, but like everything it starts to get a little old.

Being able to have a good cell phone signal to hear is one thing, but it's another to listen to the person on the other end. I mean really listen. The one thing that gets me into more trouble at home is my inability to be a good listener. I hear Judy and Shelby when they talk to me, but because my mind has a tendency to be thinking about other things, I haven't really listened.

I don't do it to be rude, but I don't know how many times I have heard later, "I told you we were going to do this or I told you I had a doctor's appointment. You musn't have been listening again." I cringe every time I hear those words. What's the answer for me (and I hope there are other guys out there with this problem)? I know it's to slow down and pay attention to the person who is talking to me and focus.

This listening problem can also happen to us in the spiritual realm as well (doesn't everything?). 584 times the Bible mentions the word listen and in most cases it's in relation to us listening to God. The other times we would like God to listen to us. Like life, listening to God and his voice can keep us out of trouble.

Jesus also implored us to listen to his voice or there would be consequences. Then he added, “Pay close attention to what you hear. The closer you listen, the more understanding you will be given—and you will receive even more. To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given. But for those who are not listening, even what little understanding they have will be taken away from them.” Mark 4:24-25

Imagine that. There is a benefit to listening and a consequence for being absent-minded or ignorant. If we slow down enough in our busy schedules enough, set time aside for Jesus, turn off the television and radio in the car once in a while, we might be able to listen for His voice.

I know at times I hear God and I think I know what He wants me to do, but if I don't listen close enough or if think I can hear Him over the television there is a good chance I'll get His instructions wrong. The verse above is telling me if I don't listen intently or I get lazy and ignore Him, I not only will lose out on gaining wisdom, but in a way I'll get dumber. Spiritually dumb!!

I have the privilege of teaching in a spiritual growth class at church and one of my topics is the importance of quiet time. We are now officially in the hot lazy days of August and lounging by the pool or sleeping in on the weekends sounds especially appealing. But for Judy and I, we know we need the Lord more than ever in this season. I'll admit, I'm tired by the end of the day and getting up early can be a struggle.

But the benefits are immeasurable. I get to spend time each day with the creator of the universe and He wants to speak to me and He wants me to listen. My prayer is that we would all take a Psalm 46:10 moment each day. Be still and know that God is God. Be ready. Be prepared. Hear God's voice and more importantly listen.

I gotta go. I hear Judy calling and I don't want to miss out and what she has to say. Bless you all.